Hey all,
I've got the day off from work today to finalize (do the other 75%) of packing up my belongings for the move tomorrow. Heading to Watertown to be back in civilization, and of course closer to NoOprah's lovely boutique. I'll also be closer to bostongraf for our Saturday morning breakfast meet ups. It's kinds like buddy night, but with far less umbrella drinks.
So as not to confuse Cake and Sparkle (which isn't a put down, I'm starting this out of genuine concern for your mental states) this is indeed a current blog posting. this move hasn't happened yet, it's scheduled for September 29th. So feel free to comment as if it's actually happening now because, well, it is.
Friday, September 28, 2007
Thursday, September 27, 2007
On top of Old Smokey
Lighting a cigar on top of a boat in windy Boston Harbor while its drizzling can be a difficult thing to do. And when you've used 1/4 of the book of matches you may start to feel some pressure to get this done or look like an ass. Now I could have asked someone for a lighter, or I could have lit the other 3/4 of the book of matches all at once and hoped for the best. I chose the latter which just barely worked.
The cigar was enjoyed and I didn't feel like a failure any more than I already had that night.
The cigar was enjoyed and I didn't feel like a failure any more than I already had that night.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Shortest job ever?
So many of you know that I started my new consulting engagement this morning and are probably wondering why I'm writing a blog entry at a client site. Fair enough. However, I'm not writing this from the client site. I'm writing from my office back at good old home base. So here's what happened:
I show up at 8:50 at the client site for my 9:00 meet and greet. The person that arranged my contract on their side wasn't in yet so I was asked to wait in his office. 15 minutes go by and the person who escorted me there stopped by to see if he was there yet. He wasn't and she offered a few things to help me out just as my phone rang. It was my sales guy from good old home base telling me that he got a call from the client late last night saying that the deal was off and that they were going to try and get this job done with internal resources. Unfortunately he didn't get the message until this morning.
So now I'm there, in his office, and wondering WTF? My first thought was "dammit why did I go spend $350 last night on non-fat guy shirts and dress clothes which I hate wearing anyway?" Ok, I'll need them anyway for the next client site, but I altered my plans last night to be able to go shopping. Then I had the Matrix scene in my head and half expected the voice on the phone to call me Neo and tell me to do exactly as he said if I wanted to get out of there, instruct me to stay low and run down to the next cubicle.
Oddly this wasn't my shortest job ever. When I was 15 my friend Rich and I got jobs at Foot Locker in Harvard Sq before it opened. I wasn't scheduled to start until after I got back from vacation in Arizona visiting the grandparents. So I get home and I have a message on the answering machine from Rich that simply says "Don't bother going to work tomorrow we both got fired". Bwa!?!?!?. So I called and asked him "What the fuck did you do to get us both fired in under a week?" He wasn't sure what happened he was just asked to not come back in. I called the manager and pretended not to get the message. He essentially said that they found someone else that could work full time instead of us 2 as part time after we were already hired. Man was I pissed.
However I wasn't pissed this morning. It was funny if nothing else. And it gave me the opportunity to open up my car on the way to work which I haven't been able to do simply commuting down Rt 117 in the morning at 30 MPH if I'm lucky. So there was at least a bright side.
I show up at 8:50 at the client site for my 9:00 meet and greet. The person that arranged my contract on their side wasn't in yet so I was asked to wait in his office. 15 minutes go by and the person who escorted me there stopped by to see if he was there yet. He wasn't and she offered a few things to help me out just as my phone rang. It was my sales guy from good old home base telling me that he got a call from the client late last night saying that the deal was off and that they were going to try and get this job done with internal resources. Unfortunately he didn't get the message until this morning.
So now I'm there, in his office, and wondering WTF? My first thought was "dammit why did I go spend $350 last night on non-fat guy shirts and dress clothes which I hate wearing anyway?" Ok, I'll need them anyway for the next client site, but I altered my plans last night to be able to go shopping. Then I had the Matrix scene in my head and half expected the voice on the phone to call me Neo and tell me to do exactly as he said if I wanted to get out of there, instruct me to stay low and run down to the next cubicle.
Oddly this wasn't my shortest job ever. When I was 15 my friend Rich and I got jobs at Foot Locker in Harvard Sq before it opened. I wasn't scheduled to start until after I got back from vacation in Arizona visiting the grandparents. So I get home and I have a message on the answering machine from Rich that simply says "Don't bother going to work tomorrow we both got fired". Bwa!?!?!?. So I called and asked him "What the fuck did you do to get us both fired in under a week?" He wasn't sure what happened he was just asked to not come back in. I called the manager and pretended not to get the message. He essentially said that they found someone else that could work full time instead of us 2 as part time after we were already hired. Man was I pissed.
However I wasn't pissed this morning. It was funny if nothing else. And it gave me the opportunity to open up my car on the way to work which I haven't been able to do simply commuting down Rt 117 in the morning at 30 MPH if I'm lucky. So there was at least a bright side.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Oh shit! Am I a furry!?!?!?!
http://furry.wikia.com/wiki/FurrySexuality
For those of you that don't know what a furry is read this or none of this will make any sense. However you should know that when most people find out what a furry is they wish that they hadn't.
Done reading? Sorry I had to do that to you, but now you know my pain. I myself found out what a furry was a few years ago when a guy I know let me know that he was one when he mentioned that he and his lover frequent Furry-Con, an all furry convention. I shit you not. I thought he was kidding, and I wish it were so. Seriously, I don't think I had an erection for weeks*.
As many of you know I was at the San Diego Comic Con a few weeks ago. Now at large sci-fi and comic book conventions there are often people that dress up as fictional characters (called cosplayers=costumed play) and roam the convention. They're a harmless lot of nerds and some of the costumes are quite impressive, or rather funny. Sometimes it's just an opportunity for a woman to wear little clothes and gather a lot of attention from the throngs of sexless nerds. Case in point; the slave Princess Leia outfit wearing woman (Return of the Jedi) that's been there the past 3 years that admittedly fills it out nicely, and the fat woman that wears one for, what I hope is, irony.
Now since this convention is so amazingly huge (something like 40,000 in attendance each day) the safe harbor to totally be a freak among freaks is nurtured. There's a great little downtown area in SD called the Gaslamp District with a ton of great restaurants and clubs that con attendees basically take over for the week. Now it wouldn't surprise you to know that the cosplayers, in this massive sea of nerds and geeks, feel totally comfortable walking around this area of town in costume. And hey, good on ya and let your freak flag fly people.
Now you thought I forgot about the furries right? Or you wished I had? Sorry Charlie now we get down to the subject of today's blog; Am I a furry? You should know that furries are usually in fully encompassing suits like a mascot or something. So we're walking through the Gaslamp District and headed out for dinner when we come across a beautiful young woman dressed in a Josie and the Pussycats outfit, and she filled it out nicely if I may say. I'll also say that there is nothing wrong with a beautiful woman walking around like that in public, nothing at all. Now here's the problem; we have a woman dressed in an outfit meant to look animal like. It has cat ears, a tail, and is tiger striped. I made a comment about her to my friends as we passed by her and someone jokingly said that made me a furry. Now anthropomorphic animals have never got me hot (Grimace does nothing for me), but she was certainly on my radar. Am I some kinda half furry like a bisexual of the furry world?...
*Ladies that's not true at all, it's just for dramatic weight and my own crass style of humor.
P.S. Still searching for my Asian cowgirl, (5 years and counting). No luck yet but I just know there's one out there for me. And you can all stop suggesting I pay a hooker to dress up as one. That's not the point.
For those of you that don't know what a furry is read this or none of this will make any sense. However you should know that when most people find out what a furry is they wish that they hadn't.
Done reading? Sorry I had to do that to you, but now you know my pain. I myself found out what a furry was a few years ago when a guy I know let me know that he was one when he mentioned that he and his lover frequent Furry-Con, an all furry convention. I shit you not. I thought he was kidding, and I wish it were so. Seriously, I don't think I had an erection for weeks*.
As many of you know I was at the San Diego Comic Con a few weeks ago. Now at large sci-fi and comic book conventions there are often people that dress up as fictional characters (called cosplayers=costumed play) and roam the convention. They're a harmless lot of nerds and some of the costumes are quite impressive, or rather funny. Sometimes it's just an opportunity for a woman to wear little clothes and gather a lot of attention from the throngs of sexless nerds. Case in point; the slave Princess Leia outfit wearing woman (Return of the Jedi) that's been there the past 3 years that admittedly fills it out nicely, and the fat woman that wears one for, what I hope is, irony.
Now since this convention is so amazingly huge (something like 40,000 in attendance each day) the safe harbor to totally be a freak among freaks is nurtured. There's a great little downtown area in SD called the Gaslamp District with a ton of great restaurants and clubs that con attendees basically take over for the week. Now it wouldn't surprise you to know that the cosplayers, in this massive sea of nerds and geeks, feel totally comfortable walking around this area of town in costume. And hey, good on ya and let your freak flag fly people.
Now you thought I forgot about the furries right? Or you wished I had? Sorry Charlie now we get down to the subject of today's blog; Am I a furry? You should know that furries are usually in fully encompassing suits like a mascot or something. So we're walking through the Gaslamp District and headed out for dinner when we come across a beautiful young woman dressed in a Josie and the Pussycats outfit, and she filled it out nicely if I may say. I'll also say that there is nothing wrong with a beautiful woman walking around like that in public, nothing at all. Now here's the problem; we have a woman dressed in an outfit meant to look animal like. It has cat ears, a tail, and is tiger striped. I made a comment about her to my friends as we passed by her and someone jokingly said that made me a furry. Now anthropomorphic animals have never got me hot (Grimace does nothing for me), but she was certainly on my radar. Am I some kinda half furry like a bisexual of the furry world?...
*Ladies that's not true at all, it's just for dramatic weight and my own crass style of humor.
P.S. Still searching for my Asian cowgirl, (5 years and counting). No luck yet but I just know there's one out there for me. And you can all stop suggesting I pay a hooker to dress up as one. That's not the point.
Monday, September 24, 2007
Fucking Mondays!
Dammit! So I get into work today and swing by the kitchen to grab a spoon when I see a co-worker there who, thankfully, mentions the clients coming in today. Those would be the clients the owner (my direct boss) sent an e-mail about last week asking us to dress more business than casual (dress shirt and slacks as opposed to our. Unfortunately for me I'm starting at a new client site (new to me and the company) tomorrow for a limited engagement and need to make a good impression to a) either keep me there longer, and or, b) get more of my coworkers in house. We're consultants if that didn't make any sense.
Now with my mind focused on the new engagement tomorrow I, forgetting the boss' e-mail, decided to go more casual today and to save the "nice" clothes to impress the new client tomorrow. DOH! So I had to boogie on home 5 minutes after getting to work, crack open the nice clothes stash, iron, and haul ass back to work thankfully before the clients arrived. I also haven't shaved since Thursday so I'm a bit rough around the edges. I was planning on shaving tomorrow morning. Again, new client and all. All this hassle for someone I'll simply be introduced to, shake hands, and they'll move right on. It's also possible that I'll see them on their way, but that will be the extent of our communication.
Now if you know me well you'll know that I don't go out of my way to impress people. They either like me or they don't. I don't even make this much fuss about first dates, and I'm damn sure more interested in what happens with those than with any clients. Hell, I've shown up to quite a few first dates in just jeans and a t-shirt. Okay, I was a teenager then but you get the point.
Sorry there's no funny in today's blog, just rambling.
Now with my mind focused on the new engagement tomorrow I, forgetting the boss' e-mail, decided to go more casual today and to save the "nice" clothes to impress the new client tomorrow. DOH! So I had to boogie on home 5 minutes after getting to work, crack open the nice clothes stash, iron, and haul ass back to work thankfully before the clients arrived. I also haven't shaved since Thursday so I'm a bit rough around the edges. I was planning on shaving tomorrow morning. Again, new client and all. All this hassle for someone I'll simply be introduced to, shake hands, and they'll move right on. It's also possible that I'll see them on their way, but that will be the extent of our communication.
Now if you know me well you'll know that I don't go out of my way to impress people. They either like me or they don't. I don't even make this much fuss about first dates, and I'm damn sure more interested in what happens with those than with any clients. Hell, I've shown up to quite a few first dates in just jeans and a t-shirt. Okay, I was a teenager then but you get the point.
Sorry there's no funny in today's blog, just rambling.
Friday, September 21, 2007
Snake Bite!
A long held dream of mine was fulfilled today. My co-worker Joe and I went to Wakefield for lunch in his car and we were bringing food back for another co-worker. Another car load of people came with us as well. After we ate I had food to bring back and Joe suggested that I give it to the other car since I'd be driving and held out his keys. I wasn't sure if I should reach out for them or if he would pull them back. I was frozen. You see Joe owns my if-I-won-the-lottery-car, a Dodge Viper. I've long dreamed to own or even simply drive one of these beasts.
I cautiously reached out for the keys and had them in hand. He knows how much driving one would mean to me, and I said "Now would be a very bad time to tell me you're joking". He just laughed and said that he was serious, and I haven't felt this grateful for something in a long time.
What you need to understand is that my 2 dream cars since 1997 have been a WRX and a Viper (attainable, and lottery winner respectively). I now own one and have driven the other which is probably as close as I'll ever come to one and I'm OK with that.
This car handles like its on rails and is ridiculously fast. For those of you that don't know what a Viper is it's a rear wheel drive 500 horsepower 6 speed manual monster. This particular one is a yellow convertible. It has 6 speeds but I wasn't going to need them. We were rolling on 95 doing 60 mph when a lane opened and I was told to "open it up". Still in 4th gear at 60mph I nailed the gas and hit 100 mph in what seemed like about 5-6 car lengths. Now my car's no slouch to say the least, but this just amazed me. It's the fastest and nicest car I have ever, or probably will ever drive. I'm still giddy from it.
I think him offering comes from 2 things; 1) we're both car guys and he understands my profound admiration and respect for that car. He knows I wouldn't beat on it and I'd be extremely careful. 2) He's been without his car for 2 months of prime summer driving and it's really been eating at him (got it back last Saturday). A few weeks ago when going out to lunch I told him to drive my car because I know how lunch he missed driving a performance vehicle. He was very appreciative and put Blue through the paces. Call it karma (car-ma)
BTW when a Viper owner is impressed by your car you've done something right ;-)
I cautiously reached out for the keys and had them in hand. He knows how much driving one would mean to me, and I said "Now would be a very bad time to tell me you're joking". He just laughed and said that he was serious, and I haven't felt this grateful for something in a long time.
What you need to understand is that my 2 dream cars since 1997 have been a WRX and a Viper (attainable, and lottery winner respectively). I now own one and have driven the other which is probably as close as I'll ever come to one and I'm OK with that.
This car handles like its on rails and is ridiculously fast. For those of you that don't know what a Viper is it's a rear wheel drive 500 horsepower 6 speed manual monster. This particular one is a yellow convertible. It has 6 speeds but I wasn't going to need them. We were rolling on 95 doing 60 mph when a lane opened and I was told to "open it up". Still in 4th gear at 60mph I nailed the gas and hit 100 mph in what seemed like about 5-6 car lengths. Now my car's no slouch to say the least, but this just amazed me. It's the fastest and nicest car I have ever, or probably will ever drive. I'm still giddy from it.
I think him offering comes from 2 things; 1) we're both car guys and he understands my profound admiration and respect for that car. He knows I wouldn't beat on it and I'd be extremely careful. 2) He's been without his car for 2 months of prime summer driving and it's really been eating at him (got it back last Saturday). A few weeks ago when going out to lunch I told him to drive my car because I know how lunch he missed driving a performance vehicle. He was very appreciative and put Blue through the paces. Call it karma (car-ma)
BTW when a Viper owner is impressed by your car you've done something right ;-)
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Going Bananas
Just a quick hit here. Reese's has been putting out some crazy peanut butter cup combinations over the last 2 years. Some have been good, some not as good. But good gravy did they nail it this time. They now have the "THE King Size" Elvis themed PB cups with banana cream and they are just what the doctor ordered. They loveliness is housed in the Big Cup chassis so you get the normal amount of PB as in the standard cups, and an equal amount of banana cream.
I picked these up last week at a deli on the way to work and flipped when I had them. I bought the last pack Monday and am afraid to eat them in case I can't find any more.
Crappy phone pic here (sorry it's the best I could do at work:
I picked these up last week at a deli on the way to work and flipped when I had them. I bought the last pack Monday and am afraid to eat them in case I can't find any more.
Crappy phone pic here (sorry it's the best I could do at work:
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
I'm not fat it's my shirt
So I was out buying clothes last night for a semi-formal company party coming up. I asked the attendant at the gentleman's shop to help me find a shirt that doesn't billow at the waist when tucked in (think muffin top). He said that they all do that. I told him that since my shoulders are wider than my waist I'd like an athletic cut so it tapers in from the armpits. I was then informed that they have very little selection in that cut. Basically only 3 colors. Bwa!?!?! I wasn't in a big and tall store. What the hell was going on?
It seems that the men's clothing industry has nearly given up on serving people at least somewhat in shape. Yes, if you want nice clothes that fit please don't work out and only eat garbage. That's the lesson for today because you'll be hard pressed to find an athletic cut shirt at a department store which is why I went to the gentleman's store. So I had to pay a penalty because I'm not fat? I had to buy a more expensive shirt, and with less options, because I care about my body and haven't just gone to shit? I suppose my other option is to buy the simulated fat guy shirt to save some dough. What the fuck kind of world are we living in? I guess all the fat people are now laughing at me for laughing at them for having to pay for 2 plane seats.
Oh cruel irony.
It seems that the men's clothing industry has nearly given up on serving people at least somewhat in shape. Yes, if you want nice clothes that fit please don't work out and only eat garbage. That's the lesson for today because you'll be hard pressed to find an athletic cut shirt at a department store which is why I went to the gentleman's store. So I had to pay a penalty because I'm not fat? I had to buy a more expensive shirt, and with less options, because I care about my body and haven't just gone to shit? I suppose my other option is to buy the simulated fat guy shirt to save some dough. What the fuck kind of world are we living in? I guess all the fat people are now laughing at me for laughing at them for having to pay for 2 plane seats.
Oh cruel irony.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Do as I say!!!
I give very simple instructions and am met with redundant questions. Maybe this stuff shouldn't bother me as much as it does, maybe I'm nitpicking, but life is in the details isn't it?
Medium regular:
So when ordering a coffee you simply go up to the counter at Dunkin' Donuts and state the size and what you'd like in it. I get a medium regular most of the time. "Regular" means cream and sugar. That's what it means. So don't ask me if I want cream or sugar if I already said "regular". The last time this happened I asked the genius behind the counter "Doesn't regular mean that it should have cream and sugar?" He said I may have been talking about the size. WTF? There's more than one medium now I asked him? He didn't understand the question so I stated again that I would like a medium regular, and that that meant that I wanted a medium coffee with cream and sugar. The next time I was there we went through the same dance.
So the other problem with ordering this way (you know the hassle free way) is that after stating that I want a medium regular I'm sometimes asked if I want that iced or hot. Are you fucking kidding me? Did I ask for it iced? If I don't specify "iced" isn't it automatically hot? Coffee is a hot beverage by nature. If you want the alternative (i.e. "iced") then you have to mention that when ordering. If I don't say "iced" then I don't want it iced. Now stop asking me stupid questions and make my fucking coffee!
Italian with everything:
Look up the definition of "everything" in the dictionary. Go ahead I'll wait. Back? Good. Let me make this absolutely clear you sandwich making fool; when I ask for a small Italian sub with everything that means everything. Why is it when I order my sub that way some moron always asks me "do you want hots with that?" OF COURSE I DO! I ordered it with "everything" for the love of Pete! Stop wasting my time and make the damn thing. Now you may say "but Bacon Ace some people don't want hots on their Italian sub". Fine, then they should order "everything but hots". This isn't difficult people. But no, the intelligent have to suffer (relatively, it's not that much suffering) so that we may dumb it down to the lowest common denominator.
Club
I used to work in a sub shop in college. People would constantly order a club and ask to hold the bacon. Actual conversation:
Fool: Can I have a turkey club with no bacon?
Me: So you just want a turkey sub?
Fool: No, I want a turkey club with no bacon.
Me: Do you know what a club sandwich is?
Fool: Yes.
Me: I don't think you do seeing that the word "club" when referring to a sandwich means "with bacon". So I can charge you for a turkey club and not add the bacon if you want, or I can just make you a turkey sub. However what you're ordering right now is impossible to make.
Since this all started with the coffee rant many of you may be quick to reply "time for decaf". However I will point out that my irritation at these numbskulls at Dunkies happens before I get my coffee so let's just nip that response in the bud shall we?
Medium regular:
So when ordering a coffee you simply go up to the counter at Dunkin' Donuts and state the size and what you'd like in it. I get a medium regular most of the time. "Regular" means cream and sugar. That's what it means. So don't ask me if I want cream or sugar if I already said "regular". The last time this happened I asked the genius behind the counter "Doesn't regular mean that it should have cream and sugar?" He said I may have been talking about the size. WTF? There's more than one medium now I asked him? He didn't understand the question so I stated again that I would like a medium regular, and that that meant that I wanted a medium coffee with cream and sugar. The next time I was there we went through the same dance.
So the other problem with ordering this way (you know the hassle free way) is that after stating that I want a medium regular I'm sometimes asked if I want that iced or hot. Are you fucking kidding me? Did I ask for it iced? If I don't specify "iced" isn't it automatically hot? Coffee is a hot beverage by nature. If you want the alternative (i.e. "iced") then you have to mention that when ordering. If I don't say "iced" then I don't want it iced. Now stop asking me stupid questions and make my fucking coffee!
Italian with everything:
Look up the definition of "everything" in the dictionary. Go ahead I'll wait. Back? Good. Let me make this absolutely clear you sandwich making fool; when I ask for a small Italian sub with everything that means everything. Why is it when I order my sub that way some moron always asks me "do you want hots with that?" OF COURSE I DO! I ordered it with "everything" for the love of Pete! Stop wasting my time and make the damn thing. Now you may say "but Bacon Ace some people don't want hots on their Italian sub". Fine, then they should order "everything but hots". This isn't difficult people. But no, the intelligent have to suffer (relatively, it's not that much suffering) so that we may dumb it down to the lowest common denominator.
Club
I used to work in a sub shop in college. People would constantly order a club and ask to hold the bacon. Actual conversation:
Fool: Can I have a turkey club with no bacon?
Me: So you just want a turkey sub?
Fool: No, I want a turkey club with no bacon.
Me: Do you know what a club sandwich is?
Fool: Yes.
Me: I don't think you do seeing that the word "club" when referring to a sandwich means "with bacon". So I can charge you for a turkey club and not add the bacon if you want, or I can just make you a turkey sub. However what you're ordering right now is impossible to make.
Since this all started with the coffee rant many of you may be quick to reply "time for decaf". However I will point out that my irritation at these numbskulls at Dunkies happens before I get my coffee so let's just nip that response in the bud shall we?
Friday, September 14, 2007
Survey Time
OK so since these are recycled blogs postings (uh..I mean Bacon's Greatest Hits) I should let you iknow that on myspace people send out these surveys constantly. So here goes.
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Not really. My mother saw the show listing for Perry Mason and decided she liked the name. So I'm not named after him per se. My father wanted to name me Harley Davidson Fitch but was quickly shot down. Man that would have been sweet, but I wonder how differently my life would have turned out with that name. Listen to Johnny Cash's "A Boy named Sue".
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? A little while ago while going through a divorce. I don't think I get my "Man Club" card revoked for crying about a divorce do I? Those things suck!
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING Not in the least, and neither does anyone unfortunate enough to have to read it.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Bacon stupid.
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? No just a cat.
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Definitely!
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM ALOT? Yes, but I refuse to answer this question sarcastically as it's too obvious.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yup
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Sure
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Pops. Previously known as Sugar Pops, then Corn Pops. Now just non-descriptive "Pops". I also like Kashii Go Lean Crunch. Laugh all you want but that's some tasty stuff right there.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Yeah, I don't want to screw up their shape.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Physically? Somewhat. Appropriate for my size at least. Mentally? Yes. personality? Yes.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Anything with melted peanut butter topping. If that involves chocolate then all the better.
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Women physically? I suppose that depends if they're facing me or facing away.
Men physically: Height I guess
Both personality: How open they are
15. RED OR PINK? Red
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I sometimes procrastinate
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST My Aunt Carol
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Well I didn't do this as a bulliten so that would be difficult. (Edir: Okay that answer makes no sense in this context)
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Pants; Olive. Shoes; black
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? A really shitty chicken salad sub. Oh man it was all salt. Bacon wouldn't have steered me wrong. Oh why did I stray?
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The sound of my own typing. I basically always listen to my iPod on shuffle mode so the answer changes every few minutes.
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Color doesn't matter at that point. What matters is that if I were reincarnated from a kick ass top of the food chain human to a crayon some higher power would be getting their ass handed to them.
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? If i didn't say bacon would you be shocked and or dissapointed? Don't worry, it's up there. Also the smell of spring rain after freshly cut grass. This is made even better when driving at night. It's very relaxing.
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? A technical recruiter that called me about another consulting gig. No thanks I'm happy where I am.
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Well I took it from someone else's blog so technically I sent it to me. And I love me. But to better answer the question I do like the person that I took it from.
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Skateboarding, baseball, rally racing
27. YOUR HAIR COLOR? It was red but as I got older it's turned brown with red highlights. though I'm still a "real redhead" and can prove it.
28. EYE COLOR? Odd. The outer ring of the iris is green with the inner iris being brown, but you have to get close to tell the difference. I could be lying and this could be a way to get women to get their faces close to mine though. Only time and experience will tell.
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? I so do
30. Favorite Past time? I tend not to have "favorite" things too much as it tends to affect your judgement and can limit your experiences. There are a lot of things I like to do, and I live by the motto "variety is the spice of life". I know, this is ironic coming from someone that identifies himself strongly with bacon.
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? How about happy movies with scary endings?
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Fast Times at Ridgemont High
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Blue
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? All seasons really. Winter for snowboarding and ice racing. Summer, Spring for less clothes. Autumn for the beautiful color changes to the environment especially being here in New England.
35. HUGS OR KISSES? Both. It just depends who.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Cheesecake
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Kat (Edit: Since Kat's not on Blogger I highly doubt this answer is true now)
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND Pinky. She's a cat after all.
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? An H.P. Lovecraft short story compliation. Don't remember the exact name. Something or other about horror.
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Optical mouse=no mouse pad.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? Nothing. I was at a friend's house and the TV was on, but we were talking the whole night so we didn't really watch anything.
42. FAVORITE SOUND? Pinky's purr, or the purr of my WRX's exhaust which will soon be swapped for a performance exhaust which will sound much better
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Stones
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? San Diego. And hey I'm headed there again tomorrow.
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Meh, I try to learn a lot of things and broaden myself, but I don't often focus on one thing.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Brighton MA
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Not really. My mother saw the show listing for Perry Mason and decided she liked the name. So I'm not named after him per se. My father wanted to name me Harley Davidson Fitch but was quickly shot down. Man that would have been sweet, but I wonder how differently my life would have turned out with that name. Listen to Johnny Cash's "A Boy named Sue".
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? A little while ago while going through a divorce. I don't think I get my "Man Club" card revoked for crying about a divorce do I? Those things suck!
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING Not in the least, and neither does anyone unfortunate enough to have to read it.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Bacon stupid.
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? No just a cat.
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Definitely!
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM ALOT? Yes, but I refuse to answer this question sarcastically as it's too obvious.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yup
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Sure
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Pops. Previously known as Sugar Pops, then Corn Pops. Now just non-descriptive "Pops". I also like Kashii Go Lean Crunch. Laugh all you want but that's some tasty stuff right there.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Yeah, I don't want to screw up their shape.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Physically? Somewhat. Appropriate for my size at least. Mentally? Yes. personality? Yes.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Anything with melted peanut butter topping. If that involves chocolate then all the better.
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Women physically? I suppose that depends if they're facing me or facing away.
Men physically: Height I guess
Both personality: How open they are
15. RED OR PINK? Red
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I sometimes procrastinate
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST My Aunt Carol
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Well I didn't do this as a bulliten so that would be difficult. (Edir: Okay that answer makes no sense in this context)
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Pants; Olive. Shoes; black
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? A really shitty chicken salad sub. Oh man it was all salt. Bacon wouldn't have steered me wrong. Oh why did I stray?
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The sound of my own typing. I basically always listen to my iPod on shuffle mode so the answer changes every few minutes.
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Color doesn't matter at that point. What matters is that if I were reincarnated from a kick ass top of the food chain human to a crayon some higher power would be getting their ass handed to them.
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? If i didn't say bacon would you be shocked and or dissapointed? Don't worry, it's up there. Also the smell of spring rain after freshly cut grass. This is made even better when driving at night. It's very relaxing.
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? A technical recruiter that called me about another consulting gig. No thanks I'm happy where I am.
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Well I took it from someone else's blog so technically I sent it to me. And I love me. But to better answer the question I do like the person that I took it from.
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Skateboarding, baseball, rally racing
27. YOUR HAIR COLOR? It was red but as I got older it's turned brown with red highlights. though I'm still a "real redhead" and can prove it.
28. EYE COLOR? Odd. The outer ring of the iris is green with the inner iris being brown, but you have to get close to tell the difference. I could be lying and this could be a way to get women to get their faces close to mine though. Only time and experience will tell.
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? I so do
30. Favorite Past time? I tend not to have "favorite" things too much as it tends to affect your judgement and can limit your experiences. There are a lot of things I like to do, and I live by the motto "variety is the spice of life". I know, this is ironic coming from someone that identifies himself strongly with bacon.
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? How about happy movies with scary endings?
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Fast Times at Ridgemont High
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Blue
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? All seasons really. Winter for snowboarding and ice racing. Summer, Spring for less clothes. Autumn for the beautiful color changes to the environment especially being here in New England.
35. HUGS OR KISSES? Both. It just depends who.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Cheesecake
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Kat (Edit: Since Kat's not on Blogger I highly doubt this answer is true now)
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND Pinky. She's a cat after all.
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? An H.P. Lovecraft short story compliation. Don't remember the exact name. Something or other about horror.
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Optical mouse=no mouse pad.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? Nothing. I was at a friend's house and the TV was on, but we were talking the whole night so we didn't really watch anything.
42. FAVORITE SOUND? Pinky's purr, or the purr of my WRX's exhaust which will soon be swapped for a performance exhaust which will sound much better
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Stones
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? San Diego. And hey I'm headed there again tomorrow.
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Meh, I try to learn a lot of things and broaden myself, but I don't often focus on one thing.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Brighton MA
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Why I am "shit"
So I'm at Dunkin' Donuts a few days ago in the afternoon to meet a friend and snag a (much needed) coffee in the afternoon when who do I run into on the way in but Cousin Johnny* himself. Now I rarely see Cousin Johnny (sadly mostly at funerals, and we have a huge family so I see him under those circumstances more than I'd like to). So I introduce my friend Anita** to Cousin Johnny, and he corrects me during the conversation and says we're 2nd cousins (please help me because I've never understood that whole 2nd, 3rd cousins bit).
Now you see, Cousin Johnny is my mother's cousin which I think makes us 2nd cousins. Then we guessed that if Cousin Johnny had kids that they would be my 3rd cousins. The conversation goes on for another minute or so and the three of us are stumped. At this point I just said "fuck it we're just cousins", but Cousin Johnny really wanted to get to the bottom of this so he asked the woman at the register at the Dunkin Donuts with too few teeth*** if my mother and he were cousins what would that make us?
Her answer, loud and delivered with a straight face; "Shit".
*We all call him "Cousin Johnny". I have no idea why seeing as how I don't use the proper descriptor "aunt" our "uncle" for any of my aunts or uncles. As a matter of fact nobody in my family does so it's all the odder that we all say "Cousin Johnny". Even my grandmother calls him "Cousin Johnny". So here's the thing; that side of the family is 100% Irish and from Boston. Kellie (who is my cousin, but never referred to as "Cousin Kellie") and I have always wondered if he's in the Irish Mafia but never actually wanted to ask so we just play along and call him "Cousin Johnny". I suggest you do as well when you meet him.
** I just call her Anita, not "Friend Anita".
*** I have no idea why but I'm going to go with this train of thought; Don't question Cousin Johnny too stringently and just let him run with it.
Now you see, Cousin Johnny is my mother's cousin which I think makes us 2nd cousins. Then we guessed that if Cousin Johnny had kids that they would be my 3rd cousins. The conversation goes on for another minute or so and the three of us are stumped. At this point I just said "fuck it we're just cousins", but Cousin Johnny really wanted to get to the bottom of this so he asked the woman at the register at the Dunkin Donuts with too few teeth*** if my mother and he were cousins what would that make us?
Her answer, loud and delivered with a straight face; "Shit".
*We all call him "Cousin Johnny". I have no idea why seeing as how I don't use the proper descriptor "aunt" our "uncle" for any of my aunts or uncles. As a matter of fact nobody in my family does so it's all the odder that we all say "Cousin Johnny". Even my grandmother calls him "Cousin Johnny". So here's the thing; that side of the family is 100% Irish and from Boston. Kellie (who is my cousin, but never referred to as "Cousin Kellie") and I have always wondered if he's in the Irish Mafia but never actually wanted to ask so we just play along and call him "Cousin Johnny". I suggest you do as well when you meet him.
** I just call her Anita, not "Friend Anita".
*** I have no idea why but I'm going to go with this train of thought; Don't question Cousin Johnny too stringently and just let him run with it.
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