Dirty fun

Well as I live and breathe I'm, uh...living and breathing. I've been busy with work and whatnot. This Saturday I'll be driving my car on 2000 acres of wooded private property. Can't wait. Pics and video to follow.

Snow removal

Some people shovel. Some people use snow blowers. Some people use torque.

P.S. Cake, this is why I love snow.

Help the (horny) youth of today

A friend of mine IMd me asking for help with a work project. She works at a college and needs to come up with some pro-condom use slogans for posters to hang around the campus. I popped off a few quick ideas but thought "Aha! who better to help her than the Blogeteers?". So please do add your own slogans to help these confused youths.

"Condoms: Because you don't know how dirty that bitch is"
"Condoms: He's lying about that vasectomy"
"Condoms: You may want to hump now, but you 2 would make ugly kids"
"Condoms: Because AIDS sucks"
"Condoms: It's kind of like a kinky latex outfit"
"Condoms: It's like cheating God"
"Condoms: It protects your oozing sores"
"Condoms: All the cool kids are doing it" (It works on so many levels)
"Condoms: EASY CLEAN UP!"
"Condoms: Be a gentleman and keep it from sliding down her ass crack during the afterglow cuddling"
"Condoms: They work in asses too!"

Zooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom!

We have a software release to get out today. I'm currently eating chocolate covered espresso beans while drinking coffee with very little food in my stomach. I predict by noon I'll vibrate right through the floor. Wish me luck.

What might have been

In response to Cake's blog entry lamenting that we do not have rocket cars even in 2009 as we were promised in many sci-fi books and movies at least we can take solace in the fact that certain other, shall we say negative "prophecies" haven't come true from the self same sci-fi books and movies. Like this here TV show intro explains from 1980. In the date in the intro I'd have been 19 yeard old and in my 2nd year of college. I'm glad it didn't come to be.

New Year's Resolutions

Meh. That's just a way for people to feel good about themselves and their new goals for a few weeks before they forget. How about actually living your life and improving it all year round? Too tough for you? Need a kick in the ass once a year to remind you that you have to live your life and nobody will make it better for you aside from yourself? Fine, have your silly resolutions. Weaklings.

The best use of time

It’s such a sinful pleasure, and I shouldn’t get as much enjoyment or satisfaction out of it as I do, but… I do. There’s just something so right about texting someone while on the hopper. It makes you feel very productive, and it’s a little bit humorous. I had a conversation about this a few days ago and some people were a little grossed out ,but then it kind of made sense to them. Other people completely agreed off the bat so I’m not the pioneer by a long shot, nor am I the only one.
Look, I’m not talking about after or god forbid, during, wiping. That would indeed be rather nasty. Just simply sitting there texting and “taking care of business”.

P.S. I sent NoOprah a text stating “read my blog in 30 minutes” because I know this will somehow skeeve him out. You know how dainty he is.